Food Lovers Anonymous

It's now almost July and I wanted to take stock of where I'm at with my weight loss/get back in shape goal. This post is going to be a mix between Bridget Jones and what I think an AA meeting would be (never having been an alcoholic myself, I've never been to one). So, here we go-

:::Musings On:::

Name: Caitlin Peterson

Age: 24

Current Weight: 176lbs.

Target Weight: 135lbs. (or size 8, whatever weight that entails)

Pant/Skirt/Short Size: A semi-comfortable 14

Progress since New Year Resolution: NONE. Bloody same weight as beginning of year. Had a goal to lose 35lbs. by June. JUNE. As in the month that's almost over. Bugga.

Current Food Addictions/Weaknesses: Chocolate chip cookies, Dr. Pepper, freshly baked rolls, chocolate covered graham crackers, chips of all kinds and varities, and pretty much any baked good item (donuts, muffins, cupcakes.. that sort of thing)

Length of Addiction: 23 years (since I'm pretty sure during my first year of life, I didn't eat solid food)

Length of Time I Can Run Before Passing Out: 7.5 min (I went to my very first cycling class yesterday morning and it KICKED. MY. TRASH)

Last item of food eaten: Twix candy bar (but before that I ate a small salad and banana!!!)

Amt of Times I Exercise Per Week: Two. Maybe three times if I am really good. Although I have good intentions!

Self Reflection/Insights: If I had to hazard a guess.. an addiction is an addiction. Unfortunately, my addiction is to living an unhealthy lifestyle. Do I know HOW to be healthy? Yes. Is it easier to live healthier? Maybe not at first when I'm huffin' and puffin and sore all the time, but in the end I know that I will be "free". My body because it will perform like it's supposed to, and my mind because I won't be constantly be focusing on how overweight I am/feel. I just can't believe I let it get this bad! And it wasn't an overnight thing.. it was a slow creeping, and one day I suddenly couldn't fit into my clothes anymore. How can I fix this? It's all about the principle of sacrifice. I sacrifice now (time, sleep, yummy food) for what I want later (a great looking body, good health and a better self-image). I also have to practice the lessons of moderation. Should I deny myself a chocolate chip cookie completely? I hope not! Do I need to bake a batch every week and eat the whole thing? No!! Instead of going overboard, enjoy the foods that I love every once in awhile.

Now, about the exercise.. it's hard. I ain't gonna lie. I hate getting up at 5:20 in the morning to huff it out on the elliptical and do 50 crunches. The thing that gets me though.. I always, always, ALWAYS feel so much better after I'm done working out. What is the disconnect? I know I will feel better, so why don't I go? Now that one I can't answer. Anyone got any ideas? Anyone?

:::Musings Off:::

I'm sure y'all woke up this morning and thought to yourselves "Man, I really want to know what's on Cait's mind today" And... here it is. I'm overweight and I hate it. But for the last three days I've had a knock-down-drag-out fight with myself and now have a renewed purpose in life to lose weight and become healthier. I WILL do it.

Thanks for listening.