Jun 18, 2011

Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda

Sometimes I wish that I would have prepared better to be a stay-at-home mom. I'm not talking about becoming an expert in child rearing or cleaning house, but specifically about developing skills that I could sell while still staying at home and raising my children. There are several women that I've met here that do just that. A few are fantastic photographers, one teaches sewing lessons, one sells beauty products very successfully and another teaches swimming lessons out in her pool. My sister-in-law went to school to be a nuclear technician and she works on-call nights and weekends and a few holidays out of the year. She definitely planned ahead on that one!

It's certainly gotten me thinking about what I can do to help my family out. Jared makes enough money to cover the bills, keep Janae fed and in diapers, put food on the table for us and get ahead on paying off our debt. There isn't a whole lot of room for fun stuff. Things like a new computer, a nicer camera, an X-Box 360 with Netflix, home projects and decor items, or stuff for Jared's hobbies like new guns or car parts. What extra money we have per month is put into savings for things like a new roof or air conditioning system (gah, life is so expensive!).

What skills do I have? Photography is out. Not only do I take terrible pictures, but I'm not sure I have the patience for it. I've watched a friend edit some photos and it's a TON of work. I don't know how to sew, so that's out. I can't play the piano, so no piano lessons. I have no interest in attending beauty school, so cutting hair out of my home won't work. All the typical, usual things that women do to earn a little extra income I either don't know how to do or require me to get a certificate of some sort.

Hence the title "coulda, woulda, shoulda". I wish that I had the forethought to developing a skill/talent/profession when I was a teenager or single and in college, that would prepare for today. Jared told me this morning that I could play that game all day long and not get anywhere, so we talked about a few things that would take some work, but were doable.

One of them is to write. I clearly love to spout off random nonsense on the blog, but I've always harbored a secret, deep desire to be an author. So I start thinking about it, then I get scared. Then I question if I have the talent. Then I question if the ideas are creative and if people will even want to read what I write. Then before you know it, practically in a span of two minutes, I've shot myself down before I even tried. *sighs* and then the cycle begins all overe again. Endless, endless cycle. I guess the question I have to ask myself is, do I have the guts or don't I?


Steve and Alyssa said...

I know what you mean! I am not crafty at all, and while I like trying, I would never ask anyone to buy anything I made because... well, it's not very good. You should totally go for it though!! From what I've seen, you really are a great writer :)

Regina said...

I think everybody feels like that at one point or another. The fact of the matter is, raising kids and keeping a home going IS a job! And a freaking hard one! We just can't make money at it!! Grrrr...

But, I agree, you are a great writer! And like you said, you pay all your bills so you don't "need" the extra income, so what do you have to lose?

Marci said...

I say if that's your passion then go for it. Being a writer takes a lot of work and there will always be self-doubt creeping in, espcially when you get rejections. I am speaking as the spouse of an aspiring writer.

Jarrod will have to learn to deal with the ups and downs of your writing career as well. Hopefully he will learn faster and be better at it than I am at times.

But as you said you make enough to pay the bills, which is what Erik's fulltime job does for us. After much talking, fasting, praying and temple going we came to the decision that writing is what Erik is passionate about so we decided to go for it.

Well, he's going for it while I am trying to be the best supportive spouse. Sometimes I fail but hey I'm only human and as much as I hate to admit it imperfect!

And then one day it will start to pay off, Erik sold a story! Yay! But you then have to turn around and keep writing, editing, submitting, being rejected, and accepted. It's a crazy cycle that I know I couldn't do.

If you want to talk "writing shop" Erik is very knowledable. He has attended many conferences, seminars, writing boot camp, etc. He also has read a ton about writing and can recommend books for you to read for the best information.

Whatver you decide, Good Luck!!!

randivon said...

I was reading through your post this morning and I remembered a blog post from one of my college friend (who is one of those amazing women that you cannot help but admire) that she wrote about a year ago. http://melroyrichardson.blogspot.com/2010/04/im-writer.html
One of my favorite lines (which is actually something someone else told her) she wrote is , "Sometimes admiting you're a writer feels like telling people you think you're a princess. Who cares?! Tell people anyway. If you don't treat yourself like a writer, you'll never be one, and you'll NEVER get published. "
I love it! And I know you are a terrific writer. So, I say, go for it! Call yourself a writer with pride and then do it! :-)

Maranda said...

I hear ya, I'm on that quest too. Who doesn't want more income? Good luck with the writing! I really hope you make it work.